The greatest moment in the history of television has "disappointed" a full 82% of Americans surveyed, according to a CNN poll taken yesterday.

Asked what they thought of Condoleezza Rice's appearance before the 9-11 commission yesterday, a majority of Americans said they were "disappointed" and that they found it "anti-climactic in the extreme." Of the remaining people questioned, 10% said the show was "okay television, not as exciting as watching a war or 'American Idol' or anything, but not as dull as 'The View'", and 8% actually went to work rather than stay in and watch Dr.Rice's testimony. Of those 8%, 6% found that special viewing stations had been set up at their offices for those who wished to watch Rice answer questions from the 9-11 panel.

"I have to admit," said customer service representative Tyler Dineen of Baton Rouge, Lousiana, "I pretended to be interested in the hearing so I could get out of our weekly 'team-building' meeting. God I hate those things." Dineen said that "given the buildup, I expected Dr.Rice to strip or something, or show up topless."

The National Security Advisor's testimony was covered by all three major networks, as well as all the cable networks and French, British, Afghani, Canadian, Brazilian, Peruvian, Luxembourgian, Belgian, Guatemalan, Indonesian, Swedish, Kenyan, Iraqi, Iranian, Chinese and Japanese television. Several television crews flew back to the United States from Iraq and Afghanistan to cover the hearings on Thursday and Iraqi television even hired someone to compose special theme music for what it termed "The 'If this is Democracy What the Hell Have we Got Ourselves into?' Show."